white place

i wrote this thing when i was about 13, its not really bad i think, cause its written from my deepest heart

don't wanna see...
see you lay on the bed
every second,.
in a white place.
and I hate when the doctor said,
"sorry lady, your mother is ill, please stay outside"
and I hate when she said,
"its allright honey, I'll be okay"

everyone knows she's not okay.
esspesially my self.
it was really hurting my ears
to knows you're sick

Welcome July, Welcome New Life :)

its been a while since (i don't even remember when exactly the last time i posted on this blog) . its already July, and we're actually in 2012 ! WOW.
i just got too many to do lately, so im just too lazy to post on this blog. and the thing that makes me more lazier is the fact that blogger actually changes its look. do you think it looks more complicated? but i changed it into the old-look so i can edit it easier. i changed everything, the background, the tittle and other things that need to be changed.
i've been in a complicated feels. been broken-hearted once or twice or even more. been so happy and feel like i could fly. afraid of not being loved back. macam macam yang udah aku rasain akhir-akhir ini. macam macam juga yang udah aku pelajari dari semuanya. i really really learned from it. and i tried so hard to not looking back.
but now, my heart is already stolen by someone who always putting a smile on my face. who helped me to look forward, not backward

self

mimpi apa?

ya ampun , ya Tuhan aku mimpi apa lagi merasakan sakit yang berlebihan seperti ini?
dulu Engkau memberiku cobaan dengan mempertemukanku dengan seorang yang sangat berengsek, dan sekarang terulang kembali?
apa kita akan kembali seperti dulu, Tuhan? apa kita saling mengasihi seperti kemarin sebelum ini semuua terjadi?

aku tau dia ga seperti itu, dan aku yakin dia merencanakan sesuatu kalo dia berani berbuat seperti ini

Byul (OST 200 Pounds Beauty, 2007) – Kim Ah Joong

Is this the first korean song i ever posted?? Byul means Star in korean.
Anyway, i just watched the movie. This song is soo beautiful. And the movie edit version was sang by the actress Kim Ah Joong. Included in the OST is the actual version by Yumi (Youme). Both versions are very nice. Yumi has really deep sensual, touching vocals. Aww this is a very nice song. The lyrics are very sad too..



Romanized Lyrics & Translation:

param gyeoli changeul heundeulgo
nae gimalhan jakeun nawei pan weouro
areumduphge byulbijdeureul
kadeul chaewojuneyo
malhi aphahajimah
nalkkok aneunchae dadokyojumyeo
jakjara weouro haejuneyo
keodji mothalmankkeum himekyeowon aphawado
nunmuli apeul karyeowado
kajjimothal nae sarang aphedo nan useullaeyo
jamshimado kyeote haengboghattdeon giogdeureul
kashime kanjig halkeyo
du nune suno najin jeobyuldeul
cheoreom yeongwonhi

Translation of Youme’s version:
the wind is shaking the windows,and over my small room,
the stars fill up the sky, shining brightly too many to count,
the stars reassure tired me
they wipe away the many tears that are deep inside me
don’t be hurt too much..they hug me tight and pamper me
and comfort me,
telling me to go to sleep
though I’m exhausted to the point where I can’t walk
though my tears blur my vision
I’ll still smile in front of my love that I’m not able to get
Even though our happy times were short, I’ll treasure it deep inside my heart
like those countless number of stars, forever
My dream is coming. though it is unusual that my one star is bright
it is very bright, even blinding..it comes down to my shoulder
stop being so sad..it holds my hand as it touches me
and gives me a warm hug
though I’m exhausted to the point where I can’t walkthough my tears blur my vision
I’ll still smile in front of my love that I’m not able to get
Even though our happy times were short, I’ll treasure it deep inside my heart
like those countless number of stars, forever
Only for today, I won’t cry though my eyes fill with tears
I want to laugh like those stars
Oh~ I want to cherish all my happy moments deep inside my heart
Like those countless number of stars, forever

his 18 birthday :)

today is his birthday. he just turned 18 :)

i dunno why i feel so happy!! >< if i were in Aus, probably i'll give him a present, even its not special and expensive, may be teddy bear? haha~ so he can hug it every time he wants =,= (whatta bad idea! may be he would throw it away)

whattt did i just say? did I say i feel soo happy? nahh >< thatss not true! thats not exactly what i feel!!

I feel so disappointed right now, huhuhu... i dunno y? If i know i wont tell u either.

I tried so hard to forget him. and when i totally forgot, he came back again in my life,, he talked to me nicely so the feeling to him was growing again. and suddenly there was a miss understanding between us, so that he went far away from me. and not long after that I already forgot him (again). and about 3 months later, AGAIN! he came to me! he told me  that he like me, love me (iewww),  want me to cum back there, bla bla bla

hmmm,, but when I was crying, the first name i said was always his name! until now! and when i feel weak, in my mind was always him. it seems like i life in this world is for him isn't it??

im gonna take AFS student exchange to japan, and its JUST FOR HIM! so we can meet each other in japan and have fun there. do u think i love him too much?

has he ever thought about me like the way i think about him? I DONT THINK SO 


i wished i can talk with him on his birthday, but unfortunately i couldnt. i feel so weird, its like im the stupidest girl in the whole world

again, -shuhei-

Me

shuheii :)

7:49pm shuhei

hii

7:50pm Me

2 more days

7:50pm shuhei

yup

7:50pm Me

haha

u r old

7:50pm shuhei

true..

7:51pm Me

r u still in aussie?

or japan?

7:51pm shuhei

in aus

8:57pmshuhei is offline.

9:18pmshuhei is online.

9:19pm shuhei

u coming to aus?

9:19pm Me

nopee :(

unlucky mee

y?

9:20pm shuhei

hmm

coz i miss you

9:20pm Me

really?

i miss u too :(

9:20pm shuhei

i do really. a lot.

9:22pm shuhei

aww

9:23pmMe

hmmm -.-

i dunno what to say

my english is getting worse

9:24pm shuhei

haha.

no worries, its still fine

9:24pm Me

ZzZzZ =.=

9:24pm shuhei

do u still.....

like me?? or not anymore lol

9:25pm Me

whyy??

lol

9:25pm shuhei

i just wanna konw,,,

9:25pm Me

idk

may be yes?

9:25pm shuhei

what do u mean maybe///

9:25pmMe

but not as much as before

9:26pm shuhei

ok....

9:26pm Me

o.O?

9:27pm shuhei

dont worry...

9:27pm Me

do u like sum1 in there?

9:27pm shuhei

no.

9:27pm Me

y not?

9:27pm shuhei

coz i like you lol

9:27pm Me

im sure there r many pretty girls like u

haha

really?

9:28pm shuhei

well, there are some, i guess,

but u know,

when u were here, i didnt realize it, but ur gone now and i feel, yeah,,,

but u dont anymore,,, so.

9:29pm Me

aww,,

really...

9:29pm shuhei

dont worry lol

9:30pm Me

what about a japanese girl tht u told me before?

who's tht?

the one who is an actress?

9:31pm shuhei

no way,

9:31pm Me

y not?? she's soo prettyy

9:32pm shuhei

its alright, i ll find some otherone.

9:32pm Me

huuuu

9:32pm shuhei

dontworry...

9:32pm Me

:)

u will

haha

9:32pm shuhei

...

alright

bye..

9:33pm Me

bye..

happy birthday shuhei :D

i wanna be #1

9:37pm Me

u r not angry right?

:(

9:47pm Me

=.=?

shuhei

no

i was talking to friend

sorry,

i better go to bed now,,

9:58pmMe

okaa =)